Thursday, January 05, 2006

In Da John

Just followed this link from a comment on Michele’s to a (reportedly) the most hilarious post of all time… because I do need a good laugh.

Sadly, I have already heard this joke a few dozen times (at the very least). But the opening line of the post sure brought back the memories:

“… I embarked on my third trip to the restroom. As I went about my business, I read the walls of the stall, because this is a shitload of fun.”

I was all, Yeah! I’ve seen those too. Some of those writings on the walls are genius. Here are the top three.

3. Hottie list. There’s a story behind this one. One time, ChinchillaBoy came home from school in a horrible mood, and, when questioned about it, confessed that he’d had a very bad day. Turned out, the girls had made a “hottie list” in the school bathroom, listing all the hottest guys (in CB’s elementary school… *rolls eyes*); the boys found out, and two of them decided that, to keep things fair, they needed to make one of their own, listing, of course, the hottest girls. Now who would those two adventurous boys be but my very own son ChinchillaBoy and his best friend? They went into a stall, locked the door, and started writing the girls’ names on the wall. At that time, another kid happened to come into the bathroom and heard the voices. He got so curious that he got down on his hands and knees and crawled under the bathroom stall door to get in (ewww). Long story short, the hottie list was discovered and erased by the teachers, and CB and his friend got busted.

What killed me was CB’s reply to my, “Do you realize that it was a very stupid thing to do?” He said, “Mom, the girls already did theirs, so the boys had to do one of their own. Because, if the girls are allowed to do it, and the boys are not, Mom, that’s just sexist!”

2. “Jenny loves Evan”

Right below it, in a different writing:

“Evan dumped Jenny. He found someone else while she was writing shit on the bathroom walls”

- Blossom Music Center, Akron, Ohio

And the winner is…

1. “Jesus loves you!!! John 3:16” – followed by a full Bible quote.

- Fudrucker’s restaurant, Columbus, Ohio

I mean, seriously… What is the purpose of writing this? To convert people? Exactly how many people have been converted to any religion because of something they had read on a bathroom wall?

This is my top three list… do you have one? Feel free to post – either in the comments, or post on your blog and leave me a link. Let’s spread the bathroom humor, people!

The Goldie has spoken at 9:11 AM

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