Tuesday, January 03, 2006

King Kong

Went to see it with ChinchillaBoy last night. I know it’s been out for a while, but we were all busy being sick.

The movie is awesome! I’ve got to tell you, I had been feeling a bit guilty for not liking the Narnia movie. Concerned friends at the forum were asking what was wrong with me that I did not find it perfect. Was I getting old? Had my taste deteriorated from watching too much Family Guy and War at Home? But last night I realized that I am still capable of enjoying a quality picture. Good acting, good scenery, lots and lots of action, plus there’s a moral to the story – more than one, actually (don’t put your work first; don’t capture wild animals; and (ChinchillaBoy came up with this one) don’t fall in love with someone out of your league, or else you will get hurt). I saw the previous version as well, sometime in the Eighties. I don’t remember much, but this one is definitely better.

The theater was almost empty, which was a good thing, because CB just couldn’t stop it with the Bush jokes. Each time he’d see a close-up of King Kong, he’d crack one. I don’t know why this kid does it. He’s got to be the most political one in the family. I kept telling CB to shut his mouth, but in reality, no one would have heard him over the noise anyway.

You see, we had a couple of really interesting characters in the theater. When CB and I first walked in, we took a pair of nice seats in the middle, away from everybody. All of a sudden, this couple comes in and sits right behind us. That was a red flag right there. I mean, why sit right next to somebody else if the place is virtually empty? Sure enough, as soon as the movie started, they turned into a pair of human hyenas. Suddenly everything was funny to those two.

You know these comedy shows on TV, where they play a laugh track every time anyone says anything? That was what those two sounded like.

A respectable-looking middle-aged couple… go figure. Cleveland is full of surprises.

Twenty minutes into the movie, I got a great idea. All these long weeks I had spent dealing with “penomia” (sorry, I just love the word!) finally inspired me.

I gave ChinchillaBoy a gentle nudge and whispered in his ear: “Hey, do this. Have a coughing fit, and then I’ll say that you cough too much and we have to move”.

CB is a very smart kid. He gave me a low-five under the chair, then promptly bent over and started coughing his lungs out, with me quietly giving him instructions such as “Okay, once again” and “Harder”. Finally, it seemed enough, so I told him, in a voice loud enough so the hyenas could hear, “You cough too much. We’ll have to move”, and we moved across the aisle and over to the side. Unbelievably, we could still hear the hyenas. But at least, it wasn’t in our ear.

The poor misguided creatures actually had a laughing fit at the end of the movie. And it was a very sad ending. I will say no more, even though all of you probably know the story.

CB promised to write a review of his own… stay tuned.

The Goldie has spoken at 11:21 AM

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