Saturday, December 03, 2005

Help! Alliterations Gone Bad!

I was helping K10 with his writing homework today. One of the assignments (that we left for tomorrow, as it was too difficult) was to write five sentences, ten words each, where all words begin with the same consonant.

This is where I get stuck. I honestly try to come up with some ideas to help K10 with this horrendous task. Instead, my sick and twisted mind is churning out sentences like these:

Huge hamsters humped happy humans, hooting. Humans held hands.

Monstrous, masked mermaids mugged middle manager Michael. Michael mourns missing money.

Dumb, dysfunctional delinquent drowns desperate, disabled dogs. Despicable! Devastatingly disgusting!

Military microbiologists made mutated, microscopic mice. Marvelous minds!

Wise, wizened wizard worked with white, wondrous wand. Whoo! Wand works wonderfully!

There's no way K10 can turn this stuff in... the principal already thinks we are a thoroughly depraved family, where the children are exposed to who-knows-what.

My mind works in mysterious ways.

We'll probably end up leaving the assignment sheet blank.

The Goldie has spoken at 6:48 PM


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