How to Become a Living Legend
I walk into the room and see a picture of a really cute guy on the computer screen…
“Who’s that?”
“Josh Bend.”
“Who’s Josh Bend?”
(sigh, eye roll) “Only the most popular person on Newgrounds.”
“Why’s he popular?”
“Cause when Josh was a kid… he stole some candy from the market, cause he didn’t have any money… and he was in jail… then he came out.”
“So, he was a member on Newgrounds then?”
(eye roll #2) “Nooo, that was a long time ago. When he was a kid. He came to Newgrounds many years later.”
“So why was he popular on Newgrounds? Did he make good flashes?” (that means flash movies, you perverts!)
(pause, deep in thought) “I don’t think he ever made any flashes. He’s just popular, that’s all.”
“But, why?”
“He sucked up to Tom and Wade… and then one time, Wade said that he would delete his account…”
“Josh’s?”
“Yes.”
“So how did it all make him popular?”
(eye roll #3) “I don’t know why he’s popular. He just is.”
Kids these days. It’s so easy to become their idol. Just steal some candy from a market, suck up to a forum owner (or make the forum owner mad - I'm not sure which one), and you’re all set. Do you know that Nicky the chinchilla has just narrowly escaped being named “Josh Bend”? That’s how popular the guy is. I mean, people name their chinchillas after him. Now that, my friends, is fame.
Here ’s the real story, by the way.
“Who’s that?”
“Josh Bend.”
“Who’s Josh Bend?”
(sigh, eye roll) “Only the most popular person on Newgrounds.”
“Why’s he popular?”
“Cause when Josh was a kid… he stole some candy from the market, cause he didn’t have any money… and he was in jail… then he came out.”
“So, he was a member on Newgrounds then?”
(eye roll #2) “Nooo, that was a long time ago. When he was a kid. He came to Newgrounds many years later.”
“So why was he popular on Newgrounds? Did he make good flashes?” (that means flash movies, you perverts!)
(pause, deep in thought) “I don’t think he ever made any flashes. He’s just popular, that’s all.”
“But, why?”
“He sucked up to Tom and Wade… and then one time, Wade said that he would delete his account…”
“Josh’s?”
“Yes.”
“So how did it all make him popular?”
(eye roll #3) “I don’t know why he’s popular. He just is.”
Kids these days. It’s so easy to become their idol. Just steal some candy from a market, suck up to a forum owner (or make the forum owner mad - I'm not sure which one), and you’re all set. Do you know that Nicky the chinchilla has just narrowly escaped being named “Josh Bend”? That’s how popular the guy is. I mean, people name their chinchillas after him. Now that, my friends, is fame.
Here ’s the real story, by the way.
