Saturday, March 12, 2005

My Family, The Cyber-Space Travelers

It’s a typical Saturday night in the Goldie family. We have four bedrooms, and each one is occupied. I12 is in his room, posting on a forum. K9 is in his room, playing an online game. I am in the office, well, posting on my blog, and trying to remember whose blogs I still have to visit today.

My husband is the only one that’s not on the Internet right now. He’s been in the master bedroom all day, watching movies on DVR.

Don’t get me wrong, I did get something done today. I went to the awards ceremony at K9’s basketball league and picked up his medal (yep, everyone got a medal – it’s self-esteem time, baby!), finished the laundry, did some serious housecleaning, and, last but not least, I ironed! You know how much I hate ironing? If I could choose between ironing and pulling teeth, well, let’s just tell you I’d run up some sizable dental bills.

But the thing is, all the time while I was ironing, I was thinking of this post. I’m that far gone already.

And you know what else happened? At some point during the day today, I decided to give myself a break and go on the Internet for 15-20 minutes. I logged in, visited a few sites, and, by the time I looked at the clock, two friggin hours had gone by! Now how did that happen?

I think all my family has a serious Internet addiction. Well, except for my husband, who has a TV addiction.

Then again, maybe we don’t. Maybe we’re just like everybody else. I mean, everybody’s teenage kids that I know of are on the Internet the whole time. I know because their parents post about it on the forum. No wonder the kids are worried about Internet bullying. They are so busy on the Net, they have no time to bully each other in real life.

What is this world coming to? What if one day the Internet takes over, and the real life as we know it disappears? I try to look into the future and see people meeting each other online, dating in the chatrooms and via IM, proposing via email, downloading a marriage license from the court’s website, indulging in hot Internet sex, and having cyber babies. When the cyber babies grow up, I guess the parents can take them to a local zoo’s website or to an online amusement park.

Al Gore has created a monster.

I could write more, but I’ve got to go. I need to cook some real-life food, eat dinner with my real-life family, and get some real-life sleep, because tomorrow I’m going to have to go to the real-life church, and after that, do some real-life work. Wait, I need to get online to do the work.

I predict that work will be the highlight of my day tomorrow. I’m looking forward to it already.

The Goldie has spoken at 8:07 PM


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