Tuesday, August 01, 2006


Yesterday, my evening began with meeting a filthy, stinky animal. Then I got home and found out that my dog had rolled in his own crap and needed an emergency bath. Since I cannot reason with the dog, I decided to write an open letter to the guy.

To the guy that approached me yesterday in the parking lot: Thank you for telling me I look "beautiful". I will give you the benefit of the doubt and assume it was by sheer accident that I met you in a shopping plaza ten minutes after you saw me pulling out of the parking lot of a swimming pool, and that you were in no way, shape or form following me.

I appreciate your offer of being friends and meeting for a chat over coffee. I find it interesting, however, that you choose your friends based entirely on looks. You seem too old for that. You’re what, 45, 50? Do you approach guys on the street with similar offers too? This is bullshit. You weren't looking for a "friend", and you know that. This, however, is your business. If you want to find your match in a parking lot, it’s fine by me. Whatever works for you. You should have, however, turned around and left as soon as I first told you that I am married and have children and your offer is not welcome. No means NO, fuckface. Make a note of it. Next time you hear "no", you need to get lost, not hover within inches of a person’s car door, not letting them get in. Not ask the person ten times over: "Did you give me your phone number yet?" None of that stuff. Just. Get. Lost.

You, sir, are a creep. You wasted twenty minutes of my life. I was looking forward to spending this time with my family. I do not care if it makes me look like a smalltown hick – what you did pissed me off. What looks cute coming from a 16-year-old boy, is disgusting when it comes from a middle-aged man who should know better.

I hope you read this post.

The Goldie has spoken at 11:03 AM

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